Life Matters - March 23, 2022

In February of this year our second son Steve’s sweet girlfriend, Francy, became his sweet wife. Our oldest son, Caleb married his sweet girlfriend several years ago. She is now his sweet wife, and they have three sweet children, two little girls and a boy, Caelan, age four. After Steve and Francy’s wedding, Caleb and his young family came to our house for a few days. On Sunday, after church, I was the first in the living room when little Caelan came bouncing in, typically full of energy and enthused about life. I watched him coming and said, “I... love you, Caelan!” he looked up at me and enthusiastically responded, “I love you Grandpa!” Then, “I have gummy bears! They are in little packs! You may have a pack Grandpa! I’ll get one for you!” “Big sacrifice for a little chap,” I thought as I sank to my knees to be more on his level. “Oh, thank you, Caelan, I really like gummy bears!” I said, “But you know what? There is something I would much rather have than gummy bears!” He looked at me wide-eyed, obviously not comprehending what that could be. “A hug,” I said as I opened my arms to him, “may I have a hug from you?” His eyed cleared as he came running into my arms and gave me a big little bear cub hug. Then, as he stepped aside, he looked up again before he bounced away and said, “But I like gummies better than hugs!” Have I told y’all how fuunn it is being a grandpa? 

 But you know what? Those joy-filled times have not come without pain. That little chap’s energetic enthusiasm about life has, and will need, a lot of direction. His sweet dependency at birth was soon left behind and he has needed instructions, reprimands, and spankings. His parents are doing a good job and few things send warm circles around my heart like the experience of seeing the next generation pick up where we left off, doing as good or better than we did. Which remains to be seen. Caleb didn’t turn out too shoddy himself! By the grace of God. His little son, Caelan, is so much like his dad was at that age that when I’m around him the memories of me and my little son come with feelings attached. Feelings of how it felt when he, not a year old, would “steal” my hammer while still scooting on his rear, how it felt to give him a block of punky wood with nails started in it and then watch as he exerted every muscle to lift the hammer with both hands and drop it on a nail head time and time again until it was pounded in all the way. And then go to the next one. With the tip of his little tongue firmly protruding from the corner of his little mouth. The first time he came running on the sidewalk and into my arms when I came home from work, his eagerness to “drive” the horse with the reins that first passed through my hands, his fascination to learn about everything I was doing. Feelings of how it felt when he first rode his own little bike to school, when he rode a pony, then a horse, got his bottom teeth knocked so loose they needed to be wired, the letting go it took when he started helping me on roofs, etc. and etc. and interspersed in those memories are giving direction, reprimands, and yes, spankings.  

God knows more about child-training than Dr. Spock, or any other of the 20th century “experts” on child-rearing who begin on the premise of bad behavior being learned rather than inherent. God, who begins on the premise of mankind’s fallen nature and living in a fallen world gives us some clear and precise instructions on the training of children. God, who knows all there is to know about child-training, has instructions in His Word that are relevant for all time and every culture. Our children have all grown out of spankings, but all of us need discipline at times. (Heb. 12:6-8) Through our experience with God, He helps us understand His Word in relating to our children. We are to correct, instruct, and yes, discipline if need be. And through it all, to LOVE. Love is of God, for God is love and with Him all things are possible. Discipline isn’t meant to be easy; love keeps it hard to do. When frustration makes it easy, it is no longer God’s way. Let us firmly love our children. It’s fuunn being a dad! Pray for us, we ain’t done yet. Life Matters!